Good Mom & Week 2

"This is the start, this is your heart,

    this is the day you were born.

This is the sun, these are your lungs,

this is the day you were born.

And I am always yours…" ~ Switchfoot 

The first time I heard this song I was 9 months pregnant with little man and felt a huge surge of emotions and immediately connected it to how much I will always treasure him.

Tucker at 2 weeks in his camo with his buck. :) 

Snuggling his bear. 

I have loved Tucker from the moment that little stick said pregnant and could not wait until he arrived and I became a mom.  It is something I had dreamt about for a very long time and just knew I would be good at since I love kids and have quite a bit of experience with them. I planned every single little detail out and arranged for things to be just so to give him the best start possible in every area we could. 


But, in real life, being a new mom is hard. Really hard. It is physically draining, emotionally exhausting, and extremely overwhelming. It is certainly super rewarding and one of those things that is worth all the blood, sweat, and tears.  But, I have never felt this many emotions at once and no amount of planning could have ever prepared me for it.   Thanks hormones.  


The hardest part for me is how often you question if you are doing everything you can to be "a good mom".  You worry about every little thing and even catch yourself rocking/shaking your hands at night when he is doing his "sleep fussing that lasts 5 seconds as he goes into REM sleep" in his bassinet since that's how you usually calm him even though you aren't holding him.  You wonder if you need to get a new brand of diapers since he keeps peeing up the back of these or if the bottles you are using are the reason he has been tooting more at night. The list of things that you are constantly questioning your choices and actions about goes on and on...


Last week I struggled with an immense amount of pain feeding on one side and flu like symptoms  on top of being exhausted and was diagnosed with mastitis.  Mastitis is basically a painful infection in your breast that comes with fever, chills, nausea, excessive fatigue, and some major pain.  I was put on antibiotics, motrin, and instructed to rest but be certain to continue to feed on that side often since that is the best way to relieve some of the pressure. As I nursed him that night I cried and cried and felt like the worst mom in the entire world.  I was trying so hard to do so good for him in every area, and felt like I was letting him down since I couldn't seem to do things the way the "books" or other people said I should. 


Yesterday I finally let the "am I doing everything I can to be a good mom?" worry that I have been struggling with like crazy go.  I finally came to peace with a lot of the concerns I have and realized that at the end of the day, as long as Tucker is happy, healthy, and loving life, and Brett and I are happy, healthy, and loving life, then I have done my job. Since we live in a world full of choices, opinions, and judgments in every single aspect of raising a child, we often overly worry about doing things "right" and I have come to recognize that you have got to do things in the way that is "right" for you and your family. There will always be someone who thinks that X is a better way to parent than Y, and instead of worrying about it, I am going to embrace the fact that I do have choices and we will do what is best for our little family as we go along. This goes from our decision for me to go back to work at 5 weeks and 2 days all the way down to what brand of wipes we prefer.  


As I struggled with things this week, I did realize how lucky I am to have such awesome girlfriends who have been there and can relate and recognize the importance of a good cry or an hour away just to breathe. I love and appreciate yall so very much! 


I have a pretty good husband too, who has stepped up to the plate and helped out/ supported me more than I originally thought he would.  He might not know what to say to make it all better sometimes, since he's not one with words, but his actions speak louder anyways. 1220 Brett Haby.


Now that that's out and I feel so much better… 

Notes on this week for Tucker when he is older

- Daddy calls you "little tator".


- Sako is much more interested in you and loves to lay her head next to you when Daddy is playing with you. 

- Your umbilical cord stump fell off.

- You started going on walks with mommy to the mailbox in the sling.

- You had a bad bout of the dry & peely baby skin on your hands and feet. 


- You have outgrown a few of your newborn outfits already. 

- You still have your days and nights confused and slept through mommy rubbing an ice cube on your foot to wake you up for a late afternoon feeding. 


- You like when mommy reads to you.  Especially Goodnight Moon. 

- You are starting to try and focus on toys we wave in front of you. 

- You started taking expressed milk from a bottle and eat 4 ounces and act like you are still famished.  Hence your big ole' belly. 

- When you play with Daddy in the evenings he has you root for the Spurs and works on your "pitching arm".


- You grunt all the time. You must be talkative like mommy and stubborn like Daddy.


- When you poop, you make a big ordeal out of it and it's usually heard by everyone in the room.


- You went to your first big family function and slept the whole time except to eat. 


- You met a lot more new people including the entire Mangold side of the family, your Dunford cousins, your great grandma and grandpa Arnold, mommy's school friends and lots of "Aunties".  They all love you so much already! 

- You got packages in the mail from extended family in Wisconsin who love you too. 


- Your great grandma Pomerening started your education fund.  We have to start saving for that UT degree now. ;) 


- You flex your toes a lot and it looks like you give a thumbs up with your big toe a lot of the time. 


- Mommy calls you "Yertle the Turtle" since when we take you out of your car seat you have your whole body curled up but stick your head out as far as you can and throw it back to stretch your neck. 


- Your mommy got your name necklace so she can always keep you close to her heart even when you are far apart. 

- Your social security card and birth certificate came in the mail. 


- Grandpa Dan came to spend some quality time with you and even gave you a bottle. He also brought your mommy beautiful striped red roses. 

We love you T man!

Maternity Photo Shoot

      On January 1, 2012, Brett and I met up with Sallie, the talented owner of Country Grace Photography, in Gruene for a fun maternity photo shoot. Sallie is one of my very best friends and I am so very proud of her and her new endeavor with her photography company. (We became friends sophomore year of highschool, which would be about 12 years ago, when we had a boring science class together.  In 2008 she was a bridesmaid in my wedding when she was pregnant with her son and we have just grown closer over the years sharing our changing lives as they became enriched with husbands, babies, and new careers.  


We have a CD of 30 beautiful pictures to cherish forever, and I picked my favorite 12 to share with you!

37 weeks pregnant 

This one is my absolute favorite since it makes me think the Lord is shining his blessing on us. 

"Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the father of the heavenly lights..." 

~ James 1:17

by the way - Sallie does awesome family, senior, and newborn pics too should you need someone to take some pictures of your family! 

The first week

 Tucker is officially one week old.  

Hanging out with mommy! 

It has by far been one of the most blessed weeks of my life, where I just take it all in.  Sure there have been tears too, having a newborn and being first time parents isn't all roses, but I wouldn't trade these moments for anything.  At least five times a day I look at him and my heart fills with joy, my eyes with happy tears, and I am consumed by  the overwhelming feeling of the glory of God's graciousness.  I am so in love with my little family and am constantly saying little prayers of thanks. 

Here are a few notable things that happened in the first seven days of little man's life. 

- He had his first bath at home.  He's not such a fan yet, but who likes sponge baths??? 

Snuggled up before his bath. 

- He had his first doctor's visit.  His pediatrician is the same one I had when I was a child. How cool is that?  Everybody at the office is so very nice!  

Getting measured. 

Tucker and Dr. Hall.  He's the same as mommy remembers him!

Getting a checkup.

- He gave mommy over 7 hours total of sleep (when you combine the hunks between the feeding/diapering/glider sessions) on Tuesday night.  Not too shabby! He really only fusses if he is hungry and usually not even then because we have gotten good at reading his cues and get him fed before he gets mad. I sure hope he stays this good natured!  He loves being swaddled and we call him our little burrito boy! 

Sleepy burrito boy!

- He had his newborn photo shoot with Country Grace Photography.  (Yes I know I still need to post the maternity pics too… I have a newborn, cut me a break. ;) )  I am so mad at myself for forgetting to take pics of Sallie in action but hey newborns are HARD to work with and it totally takes both mommy and the photographer!  There were some way cute ones and the kid totally peed and pooped on lots of things including his giant name sign and my Pete the Cat children's book.  Here are two as a "sneak peak"! 

"For you created my innermost being, you knit me together in my mother's womb.  I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made, your works are wonderful, I know that full well."  ~ Psalms 139: 13-14

Such a happy baby! 

- We experienced the "little boy peeing all over everything cause mommy forgot to cover that up and got our second bath" adventure.  Now mommy always has extra washcloths on hand to keep everyone dry.  

- He showed us that good little eaters make lots of big poops and if mommy is not nursing, we are probably changing a diaper or throwing in a load of baby laundry. 

- He has had lots of visitors, many of which have also brought us meals/ goodies to stock our pantry and fridge!  (Thank you so much to all of you who have brought things by, and helped out around the house,  you have no idea how much we appreciate everything.  And, thanks in advance to those helping out next week.  We are blessed with a thoughtful bunch of family, friends, coworkers, neighbors, and church members. 

Delicious meal from two awesome kinder teachers! 

My mom organized our tuber ware cabinet when she was over helping out the first few days! ;) She went to get a container to put leftovers away and one thing led to another while mommy was showering and Tucker swinging.

- He has covered mommy and daddy in spit up.  But, we are getting good at this nursing thing and mommy is no longer scared of the pump.  She had to get over that fast because it hurts to be Dolly Parton and have a kid that prefers to really go after one side and disregard the other completely at feedings. 


- He is getting used to the doggies and they are getting used to him.  Sako really could care less, but we are constantly working with her on being a little more relaxed around him…  Kirby seems to like him although she did show us she was mad about not being our main baby anymore by peeing in the house a few times.  I caught her in the act and swatted her good and now I'm pretty sure she is over it. 

Daddy making sure his babies all play nicely. 

Kirby checking little man out. 

- He gets the hiccups about 2-4 times a day, just as he did in my belly! 


- He made a quick trip to Half Priced Books with mommy to get some reading materials.  I am a reader and like to be as knowledgable about things as possible.  We plan to use bits of pieces of all the different advice as we develop as parents and learn what works for us as a family. 

I've got quite the stack to get through!

- He got a package in the mail from the UT football office!  Mack Brown sent us a whole bunch of goodies including a 2011 team picture, player cards, a personalized signed picture of Mack with the championship trophy, and a "scholarship offer".   Daddy's obsession with the orangebloods message board came in handy on this one! :)  We are definitely going to frame this stuff with his longhorn newborn picture! 

So exciting! 

Some of my goodies!  Thank you Daddy for getting Mack to hook Tucker up! 

Born a horn!!! 

We love and cherish every day with this little guy and we are looking forward to our family time this weekend! 

Oh, and to all those people who made me feel bad by telling me "You're so tiny, are you sure the baby is growing okay" when I was pregnant…. I am back down to my pre-pregnancy weight & fit into my favorite designer jeans again already.  Sure, I need to tone things up quite a bit, but for delivering a good sized healthy baby boy only a week ago I will take it!  ;) 

He's Here!

Tucker Thomas Haby 

January 19, 2012 

1:44 am 

7 pounds, 11 ounces

20.75 inches 

We are so in love already!

So here is the quick rundown of little man's debut for you.

Me on Monday, January 16, 2012 @ 39 weeks. 

Wednesday, January 18, 2012
9:40 am - I feel a real contraction (aka not just the braxton hicks I had been getting like crazy but one that made me stop and focus through it a bit more) during a meeting that my teammates notice by my funny face.  I feel a few more throughout the day but they are not consistent, ranging from 45 minutes to an hour and a half apart. (turns out I was probably in early labor all day at school.)


3:30 pm - I have my doctor's appointment where I am still 90% effaced, and at a 1.5 dilation.  She says he is in perfect position, just needs a nudge to get labor going and get here and suggests we set up an induction for the next morning.  After a long conversation weighing the pros and cons with Brett, we decided to go for it.  She told us to enjoy our last night together as a family of two so that's exactly what we did.  We went to Academy so Brett could get some new waders for duck hunting/ flounder gigging (Go figure right ;) ) and then to dinner at Stone Werks which is easily my favorite restaurant.


7:45 pm - My water breaks as we are finishing up dinner.  I kid you not.  I looked at Brett and said "Babe, my water just broke"  to which he replied "no way, that's not funny you know", which led me to start crying from sheer embarrassment over the whole thing as I sat there and gushed all over the booth knowing I could do nothing to stop it.  He immediatley jumped up, went over to the waiter's stand and said "I need you to run this now, my wife's water just broke.  And.... you might not want to seat anyone in that booth..." The poor waiter had Brett sign and then gave us a holy cow did that really just happen "good luck" as we left the restaurant with Brett's jacket tied around my waist.  The much harder and much more consistent contracts kicked in right away.


9:45 pm - We had gone home to get our bags and let the dogs out and because my stubborn self wanted to "labor at home" a bit.  My doctor, birthing class instructor, friends, and tons of books I had read had said the majority of first time moms go through labor for 16-24 hours and I just figured I was for sure part of the norm.  Brett loaded everything up (the 3 pillows, two blankets, birthing ball, 2 bags, etc.) while I gathered a few last minute things.  After timing a few contractions and quickly realizing that they were 4 minutes apart and I was having a hard time talking through them, we got in the car and headed to the hospital.


10:30 pm- After getting all checked in, answering 5 million questions I could barely talk through and getting hooked up to all the monitors and IV's the nurse checks me and says I am 90% effaced and at a 3.  The on call Dr. told her to start pitocin at 4:00am if I had not progressed enough on my own by then and that he or my doctor would be check in on me in the morning.  The nurse gave Brett some blankets for the fold out couch and told him to rest up because we would be here awhile.  Little did she know that Tucker is apparently an overachiever in many areas and had no plans on taking his time getting here.  Brett was a fantastic labor coach and I could not have done it without him.  I remember thinking how lucky I was to be married to such an amazing guy and how he has been so wonderful to me in every situation and was THE reason I was strong enough to work through the contractions that started coming so fast and hard (1.5 - 2 minutes apart, lasting for around a minute) since there was pretty much no time to rest in between.  However, I again was very stubborn and told Brett that I did not want him to go get the nurse to check me because I didn't want her to say I was only at a 4 and be discouraged.  That is my only regret about the whole labor experience, I should have listened to Brett.  (duh, shouldn't I know that after 3.5 years of marriage/ 10 years together as a couple?) I would have gotten the epidural much sooner and not had to go through the most intense pain I have ever felt in my whole life, but oh well you live and you learn right? The Dr. said to just ask for the epidural at check in next time. ;)


Thursday, January 19, 2012
12:00 am - It got to the point where I was shaking uncontrollably from the pain and once I started getting sick, Brett called in the nurse who checked me and said I was at a 7, and that they were calling the on-call anesthesiologist now, but that I would basically have to make myself have less intense contractions until she got there or I would not be able to get an epidural since it was all happening so fast. The thought of not having one and trying to push on top of just surviving each contraction terrified me so when she took my face in her hands and basically forced me to remember to breathe hard with her, I did.  Poor Brett was starting to get freaked out by the amount of intense pain he was watching me go through and later said he thought it looked like someone in shock and just hurt inside knowing he couldn't do anything to really help me.


12:50 am - The anesthesiologist finally arrives and gets my epidural all set up (I'm at an 8 at this point).  After she hooked up the epidural out of sheer habit she said "Well, probably didn't need that, a spinal tap would have been plenty since you are so far along... oh well"  Once that kicked in I was a chatty Cathy and asking tons of questions/ enjoying the whole experience.  Brett and I both thought it was a way neater experience than we had anticipated and are glad the relaxation from the epidural allowed us to share and bond over it.


1:15 am - I am at a 10, just waiting for the Dr. to get there so the nurses don't have to catch him. The nurse has me do one small push just to see if I had good energy/ how stubborn he was going to be and when he moved really far with one measly push, she called everyone in to get ready in case he came before the doctor did.


1:30 am - The Dr. arrived and I started pushing.


1:44 am -  5 contractions and some really good, hard pushes later and Tucker made his debut! :)  That was the moment our lives changed forever and I will never forget it.


4:00 am - Brett and I are being moved into the post partum room while little man is still in the nursery dealing with a bit of fluid in his lungs. (no real big concern, but needing a little extra tlc for a bit than most) Brett looks at the clock and tells our nurse. "Well, I guess it's about time to start that pitocin." ;)

Hello world! 1:44 am!

Getting cleaned up.  

Getting weighed.  They rounded me up to 7 pounds, 11 ounces. 

First time in daddy's arms!

First picture with mommy. 

In the nursery getting measured. 

First family photo.

Flowers from Grandma & Grandpa Haby.

It's a Boy! bubblegum cigars and peppermint sticks.

Going home!

Brett and I have never been happier in our entire lives, and fall more in love with the little guy every day.  He seems very good natured so far and really only fusses if he is hungry or getting his diaper changed.  We are now learning how to function as a family of three and things are going really well and we have loved all this special bonding time together.  Brett went back to work today and was not happy about leaving us.  However, life must go on and Tucker and I seem to be getting into a good grove.   

Thank you Lord for our healthy, happy, and handsome son!

Sooner or Later

"Sooner or later, I swear we'll make it there… The fear inside, the hills we've climbed, the tears this side of heaven.  All these dreams inside of me, I swear we're gonna get there. Sooner or later…"  

~ Mat Kearney 

At my Dr. appointment on Wednesday, she told me that I was 90% effaced and he would probably be here any day now.  Naturally we have gotten excited and wonder with every Braxton Hicks contraction if it will lead to real ones.  

No such luck yet. And the 13th guess obviously didn't hold either….  

Anyways, maybe the kid is just really good at listening to me and decided he really did need to wait until a bunch of things I had wanted to "check off the list" actually got accomplished.
I jokingly asked him to please stay put until… 


√ We found him a caregiver to replace the back-up daycare for when I get off maternity leave.  We really like Mrs. Melanie and it seems like she is going to be amazing with him.  
√ I completely finished his nursery down to the last little detail.  Did it on Monday.
√ My long term sub could take over my class from day one. She's done with her previous sub position and ready to go at a moments notice. As are all my plans...
√ I got the ridiculous amount of testing and grade inputing that comes at this time of year done. Spent 4 hours finishing that up this morning. 
√ I sewed his wiener dog blanket and car seat cover.  Finished the last stitch tonight. 


and now all that is done, and still no baby… 


My Dr. also said that she was on call last weekend and only delivering on Monday, Wednesday, and Thursday, so maybe he is listening to her too and staying put until she can be the one to introduce him to the world.  Or possibly he listened to another teacher who said she wouldn't mind sharing her birthday with him if he wanted to come out them.  Who knows at this point?  


All I do know is that we are way ready and sometimes I feel like we are literally just sitting, waiting, wishing.  God already has his birthday picked out, which we realize, I just hope it is sooner rather than later because we are so very excited to meet our miracle. 


By the way... that car seat cover is the first thing I have EVER sewn using an actual pattern and it was hard!  I have never had to sew in a zipper or cording before and it took me a good hour to even figure out how to change out the foot on my sewing machine.  Then I proceed to sew my finger, yes my finger, 3 times when learning how to use a zipper foot.  Here are a few pics of it. 

Trying to figure out how exactly all the pieces go together.

The finished view from the front.  You can flip up the front or unzip it as needed to access baby. 

The view of the back. You can bustle it for ventilation as needed. 

It's even got toy loops on the inside. 

The side view. 

His super soft flannel and minky dot car set blanket.  I think this material is just adorable. :) 

Me at 38 weeks, 4 days and  I so should have brushed my hair  ready to get what's in there...

into this cozy little set up and home! :)